Sunday, May 12, 2013

Reflections of a Mom on Mother's Day

Today is one of my favorite days.  I don't require much pomp and circumstance.  I don't ask for lots of gifts....or special meals or outings....nothing too outrageous. 

I just like waking up today, of all days, and know that am one of them....a mom..

I spent at least 20 years of my life wanting a child.  The desire started as a seed somewhere deep down in my heart....before it was even possible....make that feasible these days.  When I was in high school...deciding on college and the future.  Because when a girl-who-wants-to-be-a-wife-and-mom starts looking at colleges, its just a hop, skip and jump in her mind to graduating, getting married, starting her family.  I was quite certain at the tender age of 15 that I would be married by 24, pregnant by 25.

When that time came and went, it was okay...I was busy living....happily living....but the seed of desire was now a root, deeply planted in my heart...

For nearly a decade, I celebrated my friends as they got married, watched them as their dreams took off...patted their swollen bellies....patiently waiting for my time...praying....or was it bargaining....

At the age of 30 and 3/4 (I was indeed counting), it was my time for the gown and the vows and the bliss - and I was so touched that all I had celebrated with had come full circle to celebrate with me...with us...

And now the dream was in full bloom...ready to burst I thought...hoped....prayed. 

The months turned to years, the anticipation to tears.....the hope started to lose its grasp...

And so there I was...20 years into a dream when they finally placed that baby in my arms....our boy.  And there are times when I can admit that all the pain and struggle was worth it....soooo worth it. 

But then today comes around again, as it does every year...and I still wake up surprised...and overwhelmed with joy and amazement that I am one of them....

And as I lay in my bed in the dawn's first light, in prayerful thanksgiving and gratitude to our Heavenly Father for the gift He has given me, that boy....comes running in to my room, climbs up into my bed, and throws his little body deep into the awaiting pocket of my own.... smelling like sleep and chattering away with all he that is thinking and feeling after 10 long hours of silence. 

This is not a story for pity....nor to proclaim that deep rooted dreams really do come true (though they do)....

This is a story about a woman who will never take for granted that God answers prayer...her prayer.  This story is about a mom who will never overlook a moment of her son's life...will never grow tired of being a mom...

partner in crime
toy finder
ball thrower
adventure seeker
wiper (of all things)

to a boy... 

her boy.